Moved My Blog

Hey guys! I moved my blog over to here!

I wanted my own website (not owned by Blogger). I'm excited for this new adventure!

Refuse to Do Nothing: How You Can Make a Difference in the Lives of Sexually Exploited Children

*Christie had already spent her 9-year-old life abused by both of her parents, in 4 different foster care homes, and plagued with the sorrowing and constant worry of if anyone would ever come into her life and stay. She had been physically, emotionally, and sexually abused in 2 of the 4 foster homes, the last of which I had played a role in removing her from.

I distinctly remember the day that I was driving her home from school and she looked at me with the eyes of a child who desperately wanted to be loved and said, “Coral, will you adopt me?” The words broke my heart, not only for her pain that she clearly felt but also for the pain of not being able to say, “Yes.” 

I was unmarried, in college, barely had any money of my own, and was in no place to permanently care for an emotionally traumatized 9-year-old. I felt this child’s pain as if it were my own and it stirred up the beginning of what has often distressed me to tears.  

Christie represented the millions of children I felt incapable of helping. How can "little old me" really do anything to help all the children experiencing abuse and abandonment in the world? Thinking about the amount of anguish experienced by children in the world is extremely overwhelming. Along with millions of children in her situation, who have been abused and are left without a home to call their own, there are also millions of children who are being sex trafficked and who are victims of child pornography.

People often think of sex trafficking as a "foreign issue" but it's happening all over the United States as well. There are over 4000 brothels disguised as massage businesses in the United States. Pedophiles who want to have sex with children can also get access to minors who are sex trafficked victims through craigslist and backpages.com. There are also many children who are victims of "webcam sex tourism," otherwise known as child pornography.

 Blake Lively gave an emotional speech about the reality of child pornography at Variety’s 2017 Power of Women Conference in New York City this past April.

Being a mother of young children herself, she said it was devastating to hear the facts about this issue when she asked a law enforcement officer about the details of child pornography. She said, “Unspeakable things happen but I’m going to speak about them because I feel like if these kids are experiencing this, the least that they deserve is for us to hear about what’s actually happening to them.”

She went on to explain that children and even infants that still have the embellicul cord attached aren’t just being touched. She said, “There is penetration. There is extreme torture and bondage. There’s beastiality which is having an animal penetrate the child or infant. There’s incenst. Anything that you can think of is out there.”

Children are ideal victims because only 10% of them speak up after being abused and they don’t make great witnesses when they do speak up.

Approximately 50-100% of the victims who watch child pornography will end up sexually abusing a child in the future. Teresa Downing spoke on an In Plain Sight podcast episode (you can find this episode here) and said that “many buyers who are in committed dating and marital relationships say that they buy (sex with victims) because they can do things to the people (including children and infants) that they purchase that they can’t do to their every day partners. Whether that be bondage or reenactments of some kind of violence or other fantasy. Often time it starts with pornography. They want to enact what they see online.”

The statement that sexual abuse most often stems from viewing pornography is proven time and time again. One example of this is covered in this news article that tells the story of a man from Delaware who was convicted of possession of child pornography, unlawful sexual contact with a child under 13, and attempted murder. The child was playing outside with her neighborhood friends when the man started talking to her and lured her into his car. He then sexually assaulted her and threw her into a lake. She was able to get out of the lake and was rescued after someone spotted her walking around in very little clothing later that day. It’s clear that child pornography is disgusting in itself and it also frequently leads to more child abuse and exploitation by the men who are watching it.  

Most victims of child pornography in the United States are kidnapped or are exploited by someone they already know but in other countries, including India, the Philippines, China, and Russia, many children are sold into the sex trafficking business by their own families who are in dire need of money. 

In this article written by PRI, it tells the sorrowing account of a girl named Panshi, age 14, who thought she was going to the mall and dinner with her mom and sister, but was instead taken to her aunts house where she was raped for 10 days straight to earn her family money. Her mother and aunt stood outside the door listening to her screams of protest but her mother didn’t take her home until Panshi fell violently sick.

There are millions upon millions of stories similar to the Panshi and the 4-year-old girl's stories. I was witness to the suffering of one of these children. Every single day I saw Christie struggling as she wondered if anyone would come and save her; if anyone would come and love her. Making a difference for children who are plagued by such enormous and sickening problems can seem impossible, but by doing a few simple things you really can make a difference. I've found that if I spend less time worrying about the little things that don't really matter, I have more time to focus on the people in the world that need our help.

Here are 5 things YOU can do to help make a difference in the lives of children who are victims of sex trafficking, child pornography, and kidnapping and sexual assault:

1.     Spread Awareness of the issue and it’s prevalence: By spreading awareness, more people will be willing to help and donate to the cause.

2.     Donate to Operation Underground Railroad, an organization that rescues victims of sex trafficking: Donations directly affect the lives of children as the money will go towards rescuing more children. You can also contribute to further rescue operations by buying The Abolitionists. (Trailer below)

3.     Listen to the In Plain Sight podcast channel that offers additional information on the actions you can take to help the cause.  

4.     Stop the demand: Fight the New Drug provides information and articles on how pornography directly impacts the demand for sex trafficking and adult and child exploitation. Refuse to support the demand by watching pornography or buying sex.

5.     Start a Anti-Trafficking group in your church or community that’s purpose will be to spread awareness and inspire people to take a stand against sex trafficking. Don't wait for someone else to do something about this. YOU can be the one who does something about it! Starting a group or organization is a great way to spread awareness and take steps that will make a difference. 
6. Teach your children to respect women and respect their own bodies. Teach your sons that they should try to have control over their thoughts and actions despite how the women around them dress and act. You can't change other people but you can change yourself. Boys and girls are both victims of sex trafficking and child pornography, so this goes both ways. 
7. To help children like Christie, think of adoption as equal to having a biological child instead of thinking of it as a last resort. As long as there are orphaned children in the world, helping them should be our first priority. I believe we should be more concerned with helping the children on the earth that are without homes and families than with bringing new children into the world. These children didn't choose to be born into a life where they are abused, moved from home to home, and parentless but we CAN choose to bring them into our families as our own. 

*Name of child referred to as "Christie" has been changed for privacy reasons. 

5 Podcasts That Will Have You Hooked

A few months ago I didn't even know what a podcast was. Now they're my main source of entertainment!

Listening to podcasts is a great way to get inspired, laugh the stress away, or get the facts about what's going on in the world. It's also a wonderful way to defeat boredom. Cleaning, sitting in waiting rooms, and washing the dishes has never been so fun, thanks to the handy dandy Podcast app! If you've never listened to a podcast, you should really give it a try.

Just a warning, though- podcasts can either be remarkably intriguing or terribly boring. I've had to search and search to find ones that didn't bore me to death. Lucky for you, I'm sharing all of my favorites with you today, so that you don't have to waste your time searching!

(By the way if you don't have an Iphone with the free Podcast app or an Itunes account, you can listen to some podcasts on Youtube, Sound Cloud, or download a podcast app on your Android phone.)

Here are 5 podcasts of my favorite podcasts that you'll soon be obsessing over just like I am!

1. Ted Talks

I think of Ted Talks as a giant blessing to all mankind (or to everyone who owns an electronic device). TED is a non-profit organization dedicated to spreading ideas shared by excellent speakers. Each Ted Talk podcast episode consists of a short (around 18 minute long) speech about topics ranging from topics like, "Why We Laugh," to, "A Few Ways to Fix a Government." 

One Ted Talk that had me laughing and simultaneously inspired was What I Learned From 100 Days of Rejection. 

Another Ted Talk, Are You a Giver or a Taker?, got my husband even more excited for his future career as an Industrial Organizational Psychologist. I'm not going into that field, but this podcast inspired me to be more of a giver in the workplace and in life in general. 

One of my favorite Ted Talks covered a concern that I spend way too much time worrying about. And that is- my lack of time! In this Ted Talk on time management, Laura Vanderkam breaks down the amount of time we really have each week to get stuff done. I won't go into details but I was mind blown. 

There are so many great Ted Talk podcasts that I haven't had time to listen to yet, so definitely let me know if you have any specific ones that have left you in awe! 

3. Serial

If you don't have anything going on the next couple of days, you should start listening to this podcast. I was captivated from the very start with this podcast. 

You may be surprised to find out that I actually really love murder mystery type stuff. Not the fake cheesy crap like Law and Order or CSI. Those TV shows literally make me want to gag. I like the real stories. And Season One of Serial is as real as they get. It's all about a popular high school student who disappears one day after school. A few weeks later, her ex-boyfriend is accused of her murder. This podcast looks into the case more in-depth to see if her ex-boyfriend is really the one to blame. I won't tell you the rest (even though I really really want to) but you should totally give this podcast a listen if you're into this kind of stuff. By the way, it's surprisingly not as depressing as it sounds. I don't like scary movies or "dark feeling" type of freaky stuff, but this podcast is more interesting and informative than anything else. 

3. Someone Knows Something

Don't waste your time on Season One of this podcast. It was a waste of time that didn't lead anywhere. But Season Two is AMAZING. Though I liked the narration of Serial a little better, this case was just as enthralling. 

Here's a link to a video of Michael Lovoie proposing to his girlfriend, Sheryl Shepperd, on December 31, 1997. This podcast is all about her disappearance, which happened two days after the proposal. Narrator, David Rigden, searches for answers that lead him to new discoveries about the case that could change everything. 

4. Embedded

Not only does this podcast get you hooked. It will also motivate you to make a difference in the world. Kelly McEvers "takes a story from the news and goes deep." I feel very passionate about staying up with current events because how in the world are we supposed to make a difference in the world if we don't know what's going on in the world? Each episode of this podcast is a separate story that I didn't want to end. You get so involved with each story that you wish there was a whole season about it instead of a 45 minute episode. But you've gotta take what you can get!

 The first 2 episodes are my absolute favorite. They reveal the details of an HIV epidemic that took over a small town in Indiana as many of the towns residents became addicted to a pain description drug. They follow up with the victims of this addiction in a later episode, which I was incredibly grateful for. I'd been wondering what happened to them ever since I heard their story. That's how great this podcast is. It has me thinking about it long after it was over. You don't want to miss out on this podcast!

5. Invisibilia 

I actually just found this podcast today but I'm already obsessed with it. Most of the self-improvement podcasts are soooooooo boring. I had yet to find one that I didn't want to turn off after the first 5 minutes. But low and behold, I finally found one! 

Invisibilia (Latin for invisible things) is all about human behavior. The narration of this podcast is anything but boring and each time you listen to an episode you'll finish it off thinking of your own life differently and wanting to make necessary changes that will lead to peace and happiness. 

I highly suggest this podcast if you're looking for something to listen to that will be uplifting and motivational!

Other podcasts that are worth listening to (basically, podcasts that I don't have time to write about but that are also amazing):

• 74 Seconds- All about this video that I'm too scared to watch, but the podcast is excellent.
• Breakdown- Narrator breaks down crime that was committed when a father left his son in a hot car for many hours. He says it was an accident but he was accused of murder. Listen to find out why. 
• Here To Make Friends- A Bachelor Recap Show (I haven't listened to very much of this yet but I love the Bachelor and an hour of it a week just isn't enough.) (Haha- kind of joking, kind of not)
• The Unexplainable Disappearance of Mars Patel- Basically the kid version of my favorite true crime podcasts, except a little more Goonies meets Spy Kids. This is a perfect podcast to keep your kids sane during long car trips. 

Podcasts I Haven't Had a Chance to Listen to Yet but Want to Listen To:

• Focus on the Family: Focus on Parenting
• This Glorious Mess
• Rad Parenting
• Sounds of the Trail
• The First 40 Miles: Hiking and Backpacking
• Maltin on Movies

Welp, that's all for today! Remember to let me know what your favorite podcasts are so I can keep listening, laughing, and learning! Thanks for reading and stay tuned for my next post all about my favorite Netflix/Hulu shows. 

5 EASY-TO-START HABITS THAT WILL BRING YOU MORE HAPPINESS AND PEACE IN LIFE

Life is so so good lately. I have an amazing family, live in an apartment that I love, have a job that I enjoy, am married to my best friend, and I don't have to worry about killing spiders or sleeping alone in the dark anymore! It's awesome. I'm so grateful for everything I have! But I have to admit that despite all of those wonderful things in my life, I can sometimes be a real big bummer. There are times when I get sucked into a very negative mindset. I'll wake up grumpy and the negative thoughts just keep feeding off of each other throughout the day. Connor calls me "grumpy pants" when I'm like this which usually makes me smile for a second before I go back to scowling.

OUR WEDDING DAY & MARRIED LIFE

Well, hello there! I'm sorry it's been a gazillion trillion years since I last wrote on my blog. I'm sure no one noticed but I apologize if you did. Life has been CRAZY recently! But isn't it always? Luckily, it's been crazy in a good way. I've been working full time while going to school, planning a wedding, getting married, honeymooning, and now settling down in our new home.

30 GOAL IDEAS TO IMPROVE YOUR EMOTIONAL, PHYSICAL, AND SPIRITUAL SELF

A few years ago I gave up on the idea of New Years Resolutions (because who even sticks to those anyways?) and started setting goals for shorter periods of time. I have tried to stick to setting and achieving monthly goals and daily goals, which are far more attainable than yearly goals.

When I focus on my goals, I feel happier, healthier, and more capable at taking on all of the challenges of life. 

5 THINGS YOU SHOULD FEEL WITH THE RIGHT PERSON

I'm no love expert. Anyone who has every known me, knows that. But I did just get engaged to the most amazing guy ever who is truly the love of my life, so I do feel like I have some expertise on the subject of finding or knowing if you have found, "the one."